11.07.09
言われなくても
last night, i phoned my family♥. it’s been a while i didn’t phone them; i think after a fortnite..huhu. just chat n mumbles with my mom, dad n younger sis. but, one thing i forgot to say to my mom last nite;
plz pray for me, mom
i really wanna say that; since i’m a little bit tension n fed up lately; with my works at lab n so on. may be her prayer will strengthen me then. ^^
but, i remember once she has said:
i’m always pray for the best to all my children.
i think n sure she won’t forget; n also my dad; their silence prayer to all their beloved children. 
#hoping for better weekend n next week; no more mess up next week…*fighting*#
10.19.09
harapan
orang selalu ckp; bila fajar ari baru menyinsing (betul ke ayat bm aku nih..huhu), akan ada harapan baru. tp, kalo matahari terbenam, bermakna harapan tuk ari tu dh tiada ker….hihi. saje je terpikir cam2..
camne pun, kita sentiasa berharap yg ari ni lebih baik drpd smlm dan esok lebih baik drpd ari ni, kan? esok ade interbiu dgn ypm, so diriku ni menaruh harapan spy dpt wat yg terbaik dan sebaik mungkin. ~ameen~
*semangat tuk esok – berusaha chayok2 faito~ aja2 fighting*
10.11.09
coretan
sesaje nak tulis post kali ni dlm bahasa melayu lak. asyik tulis dlm english jer, cam borink lak. lagipun, bulan ni bulan bahasa kebangsaan. so, mari2 lah semarakkannya walaupun tulis dlm bhs melayu rojak. hehe…lolz~
cintaku tertinggal di malaysia
may be cam ‘over’ le plak statement di atas, tp aku rasa camtu le perasaan aku time smpai jepun slps lebih sebulan blk mesia. rasa cam x nk blk sini jer. time first2 smpai sini, kna g dai (universiti) sbb nk kna selesaikan dokumen2 yg perlu tuk interbiu dgn pihak jucte. penat gak, tp kna siapkan gak. sbb aq baru sedar yg aku pny turn kul 11. memang x smpt sbb flight yg aku nek smpai narita dkt kul 8. seb bek izyan nk tukar tmpt dgn aku, aku leh le g ptg. huhu..
tp time jln2 tu, aku terpk; betul ke aku kat nihon nih. cam mimpi ler, cam first time smpai ler…ish3. ntah pape. mungkin ni le padahnye blk mesia lama sngt. pastu duk rumah je. jadi rasa best sngt duk kat rumah, dgn ♥family♥ lak tuh. huk3. 
seronok sngt men n buli adik2 kat rumah. wawawa…tp aku rasa cam dh hilang self-esteem n keyakinan diri waktu smpai2 sini dan pd masa yg sama perlukan motivasi yg besar atau pembakar semangat tuk menyambung dan menyelesaikan tanggungjawab di sini. (-_-”)
proses pemulihan diri perlu dimulakan dgn segera dan diharapkan berjaya…kui3
p/s: tajuk lagu sebenarnye…lagu kumpulan dewa (kalo x silap). check it out at youtube…;-)
pengalaman baru
ari esok tu pulak, kna siapkan poster tuk conference kat ritsumeikan university. dgn bantuan senior, kak mimah dpt gak siapkan. aku dh wat tp, bla wat dgn senior aku tu, berlain giler..zen2 chigau. haha…x pe le. first timer kan. nak wat camne. tp sumer dh ok, mlm tu bertolak le kmi ke kyoto tuk conference selama tiga hari. aku bermalam kat rmh saido, adib & lan pali sementara kak mimah bermalam kat hotel. aku bukan x nak duk hotel, dah x dpt support dari dai n sensei, so aku malas le nak bazirkan duit duk hotel. kui3. duk rmh diorang pun ok gak, tp jauh nak mampus dari eki (stesen). letih naek beskal; dah le berbukit, dgn brg2 aku yg agak bnyk. sabar je lah…kui3
tuk conference a.k.a gakkai tu, aku hanya terlibat tuk poster session; jaga poster ttg hasil research kak mimah. aku rasa cam spoilerΨ le plak sbb bnyk soalan yg aku x leh jwb. kak mimah pun jwb sket2 je dan lepas tu blah g jln2 tgk poster orang len. X_X nak wat camne. dah nasib. lepas ni kna wat persediaan yg cukup. dah le kak mimah terang kat aku psl research dia tu sblm aku blk mesia. lps blk mesia, sumer ilmu2 tu keluar dari otak ini dgn ketidak-sengajaannya (alasan jer tuh…) camne le plak final paper aku nanti. harap dpt wat dgn jayanya. ~ameen~ ^_~
taufan melur
ari pertama conference tu diramalkan ribut taufan. cuak gak le sbb tgk berita mcm2 hal berlaku. dijadikan cerita, waktu aku blk dari conference hujan lebat giler ditambah lagi dgn angin kuat. lencun lah aku mlm tu yg berpakaian sut lengkap menaiki basikal smbl berpayung. nek beskal kejap berhenti sbb payung rosak kna angin kuat; kayuh2 berhenti lagi sbb x larat nak nek bukit dgn angin kuat; ingt nk tolak je smpai rumah bdk2 rits tu tp rsa kalo tolak je bskl, mesti baju aku akan bertambah lencun. lastly, aku bertahan tuk mengayuh basikal dlm hujan. >_< aku rasa tu le pengalaman yg x dpt dilupakan kut sepanjang duk shiga.
kyoto bandar bersejarah
ari terakhir conference tuh, bdk2 rits (saido, adib n salmi) ajak aku n kak mimah mkn kat kedai mskn india raju. mknn yg mmg enak banget – tandoori set. smpai diorang bdk2 rits sendiri x abiskan. =p…tp bagak tul roti nan dia. ditambah lagi dgn pulut kuning & ayam tandoori. ^^ pastu g bb; game arcade n men smpai sejam. enjoy gak tempat tu ditambah lg dgn harganya yg berpatutan. nsb bek esok tu aku blk. kalo x, nak g lagi jawabnye..haha
sblm blk ke ikuta, aku n kak mimah g jln2 sekitar kyoto dgn bantuan adib sbg pemandu pelancong. =) disebabkan kyoto ni besar yak amat, x smpt le nk g sumer tempat cambest. kami smpt g kyoto tower; seronok tul teropong kwsn sekeliling smbl tgk tmpt2 menarik sekitar kyoto, g jln2 kat gion; mkn set unagidon tuk mkn tghari, g nijojo (nijo castle); x leh msk sbb smpai lmbt tp leh le tngkp gmbr kat luar..hehe. ade gak tmpt yg teringin nk g tp x leh g sbb masa yg mmg sentiasa mencemburui kami x leh g gak; golden pavilion a.k.a kinkakuji temple (bkn pavilion kl k…haha), nek tren kat arashiyama n jumpa geisha kat gion. T_T tapi kehendak di hati nak makan takoyaki tercapai gak. \(^0^)/lps g nijojo, kmi g kyoto station tuk blk ke rmh…
terima kasih daun keladi
terima kasih kat saido, adib n lan sbb bagi tumpang tido kat rmh, plus servis mkn lg. ^_^ trimas gak kat salmi sbb bg pinjam beskal tuk 4 ari. thanx again kat adib sbb jadi tour guide pd ari last kami kat kyoto n ur treat too. *wink2* insyaAllah ade ari n rezeki, aku bls blk…kui3 
x lupa gak kat kak mimah tuk conference tuh; dari bwa saya ke conference, wat poster, mkn2, jln2 dan sumernye…tp sori le sbb x wat yg sebaik mungkin tuk sesi tu. insyaAllah kalo ada rezeki lg, saya akan wat lebih bek lg. ^_^
sekurang2nya skang aku dh recover cket; mgkn lps g conference n jmpa kwn2 lama kat rits kut. huhu~
p/s: mintak maap kalo post kali ni panjang sngt. sbb rasa cam nak tulis je ape yg terbuku di kepala otak & hati ni, sbb tu jadi berjela2 pnjgnye..hehe. (_ _)
08.26.09
mumble…again =p
it’s been a long time 4 me to write n mumble in this blog. hehe..
i know, it’s ramadhan now; n we suppose to avoid any nonsense talking, but ’cause it’s ramadhan lah i keep thinking much. ye ker…?? yeah, i’m home alone now, for a week b4 i’m leaving 4 malaysia \(^0^)/ ; plus dun have any work to do (actually no mood to do any stuff) -_-”\
frankly speaking, i just wondering what my future life path will be; still wondering n thinking. am i going to pursue my study; really do i?my research dun perform well; no result. so, i should work it out ler. ^_~ no more play around. it doesn’t make sense, if u said u wanna study further in ur field but no work hard towards it. (mumbles toward myself la pulak) n then, how about work? hmm…i’m scared n worried; am i really can do work in new environment. huh, what the heck am i talking. must think positive k. say no to no confidence. [how much i repeat those words, huh]
besides that, recently i do thinking about if i dun get the scholars 2 pursue my studies, by any chances, should i just go back to malaysia? hmm…i luv japan n i think if i’ve to go back, i’m going to miss life in japan. =_=” but, if Allah have takdirkan me for not staying here (japan); i must accept it sensibly, rite. He knows better n best for us *wink*
sumtimes i kinda fed up to myself >_< cause can’t make up my mind wisely, hard to decide well; or do i prefer dreaming rather than facing reality. X_X hmm..am i really damn worry about everything around me, plus my own probs make me hard to think well. lolz~ @_@
that’s for now..it’s better i talk n mumble the positive things, perhaps.
O Allah, help n guide me…~ameen~
<<always keep the faiths>>
06.08.09
crap…
what did i do in this weekend? not much – just enjoyed myself at home, besides went to gym. my weight decrease a little bit. must work hard to gain more. >_<
hmm…at this time, i wanna read the given thesis. but, not important things came to my mind. i wanna shopping, go watching movies at cinema, rambles around n spending money…..gosh. can those things satisfy myself? do them make me happy ever after?
no willingness to do my stuff. dun start research proposal yet – to be submit next month (-_-”)
i messed up my presentation for kenkyushitsu kengaku (visiting lab 4 3rd year student). really ashamed *_*- my mates laughed at my speech. what the heck!? one more day left. should i get prepared earlier?
my research dun progress much. – hope so i’ll be going to lab frequently. must do revision on programming besides reading past years senpai’s thesis.
na no mu kungume (i’m so curious) =p
04.21.09
puzzled :(-_-”):
i just came back from english class at main campus; surugadai near ochanomizu station. i’ve to go there by train. really exhausted though, rite now. huhu…
there’re many things happened lately, in my life. i dunno whether it supposed to be or not. may be God has decided them happened n i dun notice what the gud things behind. what’s on earth i wanna talk about, huh? okey, back to the point. what’s happened in last week; n what’s going to happen this week too.
last week, the 1st ever lab session has begun, on thursday. we’d to decided which field of themes. at that time, i was speechless, n puzzled. had i thought wisely ’bout that? omG..i guess sensei is going to give some briefing about research n so on. i was wrong. he said;”if i delay time, u’all won’t think. so, it’s better for u decide now n u’ll work 4 it, i think.” sort of that. >_< so, i’ve no idea at that time, ’cause i’m confius either to take image processing (画像処理) or dna computing (DNAコンピュティング). at that time, i was really wanna run away 4 not thinking about that, or going back to past to think again. hehe…what’s the heck! then, i just said i wanna do image processing, as recommended by him. last month, i sent e-mail to sensei about the research themes n i wrote about image processing, since i’d no idea about dna computing. then, he suggested me to do research about sumthing related to image processing. i was in malaysia at that time, so it’s difficult to find references etc.
both of the fields seem interesting. dna computing is new field of my research lab, n preferred by sensei. on the other hand, image processing is quite hard; full of programming n sumthin like that. (-_-”) fortunately, for both of those research areas, i’ve malaysian sempai. ^^v
really hope so that what i’d chosen is right. gambaru shika nai…(?)
yesterday i’d seminar class – reading some english research papers, which related with the research theme. then, my turn came; to translate, n explain some of the words. at that moment, i dunno why; my english n japanese became like trash; going upside-down. ashamed 4 that. i supposed to understand what terms used in the paper, but i’ve no idea ’bout that. so, i really sorry 2 sensei, n my mates too.
this thursday, we’re going to write study proposal; about what we’re going to do 4 thesis in one whole year – sumthing like research plan. oh my~ it like a sudden to do sumthing in rush. so, i’m going to meet my team-mates tomorrow to discuss about that. hope so ideas will come out..=)
but, tomorrow i’ve also korean class. yeah..! learning new language, even i dunno i capable of that or not. at least, the lecturer is nice n said there’re no student fail in that subject yet. huhu~
i’m looking forward for everything in my life. haha~ going crazy already (?)
04.16.09
when sakura blossom….
just wanna drop something in my blog, since i dun update it 4 two weeks. really sorry 4 it (_ _) it’s not because i’m busy or what; just no idea 4 entry…huhu. btw, this post just mumbles from me, myself n i. plz 4give me if it sounds weird or meaningless.
sakura blossom in early april n around that time the school’s (n university’s too) term starts.
it’s about a year i’m in japan. it seems really fast, the time is. unexpected! even it was a year, i refuse to admit the fact. haha…what the heck i’m writing here? i dunno how to say it; it looks like i can’t say my one-year-experiences has mutured me. i still have no confidence about my future life. voices of afraid n worry are heard deep from my heart.what should i do next? my life path will be getting dull? oh no…i dun want it happen.
may be sometimes, i enjoy too much in this life. oh, we’re young! it’s youth time. seishun da. do i take granted 4 what i got? that’s why i do take easy. >_<
i’m always getting into confusion. is this correct? is that okay? n sometimes i think i’m a liar or hypocrite in my own life; seems i’m trapped by myself in others’ shadows. again, weird thing i write here though. are all my actions, till now, are correct? or just my act to promote myself n dun wanna hurt anybody.those worries n thought haunt my mind lately. i dunno what to say or decide to do. so, i just continue my life as usual, but at the same time try doing my best 4 anything i could. as well, hoping Allah s.w.t will help this nothing-good slave n let know what the best to do. huhu. ameen~
i really wanna start (or may be reset?) my daily life with brightness, even others feel not. hehe…;-)
04.04.09
tell me why??
i started writing this post at about quarter to 12 midnight. it’s the time when i prepared myself b4 to go to bed after almost half day journey coming back to japan, last week. it’s been a week i left my home sweet home; to continue my life here; may be another a year or more than that. gambarimasu…
there’re many ‘incidents’ (should i call them like that?) happened, to me.
on monday my pals n i met our new-ariving kouhaitachi (juniors) at yokohama. it’s the 1st time 4 me ’cause i didn’t go to meet them at hachioji seminar house. huhu.. we went yokohama to settle down certain stuff about buying second-hand items from malaysian students there. then we went to have lunch at sakuragicho n had a stroll around there. what’s really make sense to me is; am i a good sempai (senior) to them? hope so ler…i’ll try my best to help n guide them. oh, it’s been a year in japan! is my a-year-experience really enough 4 that? or must i wait 4 another year? oh gosh! >_<
time’s running very fast…
the next day, my roommate n i went to gym; to register the membership. actually that day was the last day of discount promotion, so i dun wanna miss it. hehe… thanx dude 4 telling me about that. then, on wednesday we went to gym. we’re introduced about the facilities n activities can be done over there. so, we decided to do the muscular section; running, weight-lifting n sumthin like that. oh, it’s quite hard since i rarely do excercise. ^_- after that, we had a rest on massage chair n aerobic class b4 leaving the gym. i was so tired but still continue watching boys over flower. hihi.. may be i should make this going to gym as my new target, 4 this year- gaining my weight ^^v
last thursday was my bad luck day, i think. on that day, we got the result 4 last sem. i was shocked n surprised ’cause i failed in one subject T_T fortunately it’s elective subject n unfortunately my gpa dropped a little bit. actually i was really sad after finishing that paper, during exam ’cause it’s quite difficult – full of maths theory n so on. i just let it go like that n hope may miracle will come. but, it turned contrastly. perhaps God wanna show n tell me something 4 not taking sumthin easily. who knows?
class is going to start next week friday but i dun feel anything – no pressure. or am i still in honey-moon holiday or what? hope so not. i wanna do sumthing!! O God help me…tell me why..
04.01.09
episode III of survivor
for the 3rd episode, i dun want to write much for certain reasons. i dun remember exactly many spots’ n stuff’s name. so i just put some pics 2 share with u all n write a little bit. really sorry 4 not continuing the diary as planned. (_ _)
Mar 09 (Mon)
have a drink with new frenz at restaurant ^_^
celebrating one of raja's fren; surinja's besday
both of pics above happened on today’s early morning, i meant at midnight. then, at noon, we went to bandung town – to go shopping. yeah!! firstly we went to pekan baru; to buy some souvenir for my family. so i bought some cloths 4 my mom, kain pelikat 4 my dad, kain telekung 4 my grandmom n some indonesian delicacies 4 all family members.
sumthin like fruit drink n tasty indonesian abc
after having lunch, we went to factory outlets (f.o.). at that time, i’d spent almost half of my money 4 the souvenirs. so, i hoped that i could manage well 4 the budget. there’re many f.o. in bandung, so we spent a whole day to find what we wanna buy till night. it seems we had become crazy n shopaholic on that day. haha.. i bought t-shirts, jeans, wallet, etc.
lastly, i’d over-budget, so i had to use my credit card.
at night, we had dinner at nearest mall. i dun remember what its name is. it looks like high-class venue; for me. hehe..then we went home to rest after tired shopping in the whole day; coz tomorrow we wanna continue shopping again. haha..
Mar 10 (Tue)
pure heart campaign organized by malaysian students at unpad
one of the activities - lawan tarik tali
expensive beef chop - around rm32; silap order punye pasal..hihi
dinner at qua-li restaurant, paris bon java
Mar 11 (Wed)
we went to soekarno hatta airport in jakarta at noon to go back to malaysia. i hope this 5 days journey will be something special in my life diary n teach me about life n so on. thanx to raja n others in bandung 4 the hospitality n treat there. hope see u all again, in future.
03.12.09
survivor
i just came back from bandung yesterday, after 5 days tour there. such a fantastic experience n sweet memory. i went to bandung with my pal n stay at ex-jad mate’s house there. here are how my journey was.
Mar 6 – Fri
air asia flight depart from penang to jakarta at about 9.10 p.m. actually we went to penang airport by bus; to cut our budget =p but, there’re damn bad traffic jam n the journey to the airport become longer. we worried if we arrive not at the exact time-to check in. (we supposed to check in 45 mins b4 departure) when the bus stopped at the airport terminal, my pal n i ran n rushed to the air asia caunter. it’s a relief ’cause the staff didn’t scold us for coming late.
we board in the flight n our journey to jakarta was about 2 hours. but, when we arrived at soekarno hatta airport, we lost;dunno to go where. our frenz supposed to wait there, but he mailed us that he couldn’t fetch us ’cause distance between jakarta n bandung is about 3~4 hours duration. so, he sent somebody-the travel agent’s people,pak joni to pick up us to go to bandung. we dunno where that guy went at that time. really irritating. >_< he should wait for us at the arrival exit. then, a guy;or can i say a stranger, approached us n offer help. ’cause we dunno the ‘reality’ in indonesia, we just trusted him. he offered us to use his handphone n brought us to the taxi service. we just get on the taxi, ’cause the person who suppose to fetch us didn’t appear, to go to bandung. after getting into the taxi, my frenz called us-to not get into other taxi, but go n find the agent’s people. oh gosh! what should we do now? we told the driver to sent us back to the airport, coz we used the taxi’s service we had to pay 30% of the fare. omG…
after that, there’re another guy came to us. we refused to get his aid, but he said he really wanna help us. it can’t be helped, so we said okey; ’cause we dun wanna pay anymore-wasting our money k! he said that he wouldn’t charge anything, just wanna help. he offered us to use his handphone to called pak joni. fortunately, he brought us to meet up with pak joni. but, what really made me angry (just wanna insult him though) he wanna us to pay for using his handphone-for used credit. we had to pay it, if not, i dunno what will happen coz it’s our 1st time there.
we went to bandung using mpv car. it’s quite sleepy so i slept. but, it was scary journey-worried where the driver would bring us to, dunno the real environment about the country. we didn’t expect it became like that. we just like a survivor in new land. huhu…
at last, we arrived at my frenz’s house at about 5 a.m. praise be to God.
to be continued.
